sweetaddiction

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2001-07-06 01:34:07 (UTC)

i can not breathe. not today...

i can not breathe.
not today.
now other things are more important
to me.
i am not sure when everything switched.
we can not talk.
ill just sit back
and watch you twitch
dance to the music thats blowing up the place.
writher in the lights that stroke your face.
and pretend that you arent real.
pretend.
pretend so that way.
you do not have to feel.
and maybe i will cry for you.
i helped you stand.
and you left me.
to fall.
i fell into your
rose tinted world.
and now you have left me here
to curl.
up.
and die.
alone...
i was your prey.
and i never knew.
i was the aspiration
that you never grew.

so

take your mens clothing.
and your old spice.
your stupid haircuts.
and your strap on vice.
take your fuckings hands off me.
you said you changed your mind.
take your stupid lesbo a go go
at southern fucking nights.
take the whores with fake breasts.
and the whores with real ones.
take my stupid plastic friends.
because theyre hot.
and theyll hang out with you.
because YOU drive them around.
take youre STUPID fucking baby voice.
that always drove me crazy.
and your fucking anal retentive cleansing issues.
and.
god
make them take that fucking Gap Dream spray shit off the
line.
i hate that smell now.
it makes me cry.
take the fucking HARDCORE psycho i love you letters you
wrote me.
and the fucking ROLLS of film we took.
the rings.
and i lied.
it never NEVER worked.
you actually sucked.
but it was good. because i loved you and i didnt care.
just like you only hated claudia because she was moving in
on me
but now.
you dont care.
take the fucking morals that youve lost.
the respect that youve lost.
the way you treat you MOM now.
you know.
i will be in your life FOREVER hun
your mother will keep that orniment
i know it.
and every FUCKING christmas
you will have to look at me.
and you.
on your stupid fuckign christmas fucking tree.
your purity has gone.
fucking take that stupid church
and your youth groups.
and your oh so fake i go to panera fucking friends.
and the way you chased after me.
the way you slamed the door in my face.
the way you told me i was better than this.
fucking i KNEW
im not stupid
you never were that smart though
and you want to tell ME that YOU know what love is.
well.
you dont.
youre one of those stupid 20 year old butch dykes that
think that if they act like a man girls will like them
if they are fucking pricks.
and that COMPLETLY contradicts it hun.
you are a fucking prick.
youre the most incompassionate, insensitive, unAWARE,
fucking
mean and heartless
FAKE
person i have ever fucking met
i cant believe i was so stupid
and i cant fucking forgive myself.


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