blueswede

maybe i should have just taken up the banjo

I'm in an awful state right now. I haven't updated in three
weeks, mainly because there was nothing to report. However,
a few things have changed.

My would-be girlfriend is still out of town (see last six or
so posts for complete details), but she's due to return any
day now. I sent her an e-mail asking her to get ahold of me
when she got back, and now that she'll be home soon, I find
myself checking my e-mail several times a day, only to have
my hopes crushed when nothing arrives but more advertising
from eBay.

I purchased the parts for my new computer, and the last of
it is scheduled to arrive tomorrow. Problem: I plan to have
multiple operating systems on this beast, and that will most
likely entail installing Windows 98 first. But, my sister
currently has the disk for that, and so I can assemble all
of my hardware, but can't really do anything useful until
she ships back the disk.

Finally, I have almost enough money to purchase the guitar I
was wanting, a nice solid-top Yamaha, classical style. The
problem here is, I'm having doubts about whether I want to
go ahead and get it. After all, it's $260, and I'm having
some doubts about this whole guitar thing. I'm really not
enjoying the stuff that my instructor has me working on. He
has me working from a book on blues guitar, but I'm really
not all that interested in playing blues. It's apparently a
good precursor to learning jazz, which is what I really want
to play, but for some reason I just can't get into blues.

So right now I'm at three different impasses: one with my
love life, one with my computer, and one with my music. Of
course, I could avoid all three (in reverse order) by only
playing Dave Matthews songs from tablature, abandoning my
love for DOS programs and my desire to learn other operating
systems, and deciding to become one of these chick-magnet
dorm stairwell guitar weenies, completely forgetting about
the wonderful girl I knew from back home who played computer
games and actually had decent taste in music.

But to do all that, I'd have to be someone I'm not. And
that thought makes me really happy to be who I am.