Ad 2:
2001-07-03 06:07:28 (UTC)

for my bp.

she had so many possibilities...
we all say that now.
but how much is too much.
for one soul to take.
what is the deciding factor.
when is it too late.
should i have given up...
i will never forget you.
i burned your pictures long ago.
i burried all of the memories
and you died.
in my mind.
but now that youre really gone...
youre back again.
and now.
it is too late.
was there something i could have done.
a road i could have taken.
something i COULD have said.
to make you realize.
how beautiful you are.
how beautiful you will always be.
in my eyes.
my mind.
and now.
that is it.
that is all that i will ever have
all that is left.
i wonder if it hurt.
i wonder if you thought of anything.
but now i suppose.
you know
much more than me...
time will go by.
and the tears will eventually stop.
i might forgive myself one day.
i wonder if you could remember.
all the nights we spent together
disecting the world.
and ourselves.
what is a girl to do...
in a world so clutter in hate.
what is a girl to do.
what were you supposed to do...
not this.
that much i know.
you werent supposed to do this.
and youve left me here.
in a different way than most.
but you did the same thing.
even you.
you didnt just leave me
you left it all
all you had wasnt worth it to you.
not worth the pain
you couldnt find peace here.
but i hope you have it now.
where ever you are.
you will always be beautiful to me...
and i will still hold on.
i will always love you.
i will always remember..
you were my bestfriend after all.
you were my love too.
you were it all to me.
but you were never enough for yourself.
may you find what you are looking for.
amoungst the stars.
youll stay alive always.
within me...
if there is any compassion in the entire existance that we
are all involuntarly a part of.
if there is anything anywhere listening to my prayers, if i
can call them that.
if there is any love left.
in all of this clutter.
may you finally be happy.
may you be at rest.
and at peace.
for all of eternity.

~best friends forever, apart or together~

seperated by time, hate, love, angst, and now worlds. we
will make it...together.