JustMe

Inside My Head
2002-07-18 20:32:43 (UTC)

Unsent letter

Today I was missing you SO much! I've almost send you a
letter, when I've remembered suddenly about this Diary -
what a bless! Now you wouldn't get annoyed with me bugging
you and i wouldn't be ashamed once again of myself...
So - this is kind of letter I would want to send to you
today:
...A thought of you today made my day pretty blue...i miss
you...more then you ever can imagine! more then i could
ever thought i will be missing you!..
If there could be anything I can give to make you feel my
love, i would give it, rejoicing...but we are from so much
different Worlds, different lifes, different paths. it is
hard to keep pretending that it could be true - our love...
there never was OUR love... only in my silly head... i do
know that what i felt, what i'm feeling now and what i will
feel ever for you - this is real, this is MINE...but there
is no hope to believe that your feelings for me are same...
you've said to me in one of your last letters - "i miss you
so much!", you've said to me "i keep thinking about you all
the time..." sweet sweet lies...you never tried to find
me...is this how "true" love should be happenning? what is
it - your pride or your fear, that keeps you from reaching
me?...i guess, i will never know this...you keep me close
to you by not letting me go...
will i ever learn, God ???!!!!!...




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