... SheLL*z . LyFe ...
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i wrote marc an email today and told him how i felt ..
It read as follows ...
" OK Marc, theres something i gotta tell ya.
I knoe you like Nici and all, and thats ok. but i wanted to
let you knoe that i really like u alot. ive felt this way
for a long time i was too scared you wouldnt feel the same
way, so i didnt say ne thing. Now im not saying i want a
relationship or anything cuz i dont wanna ruin our
friendship .. i just wanted to let you knoe how i feel.
Please dont let this change ne thing between us, if you
dont want the same shit i do, ill get over it I just
had to tell uthis, it was bothering me for the longst time.
So write back when you get this and let me now what you
want. I really need to knoe. TTYL "
He what he wrote back ...
"well i guess u can say im confuzed bout this situation. "
hm. well thats not the answer i was looking for. I guess
thats just his way of saying 'no' nicely. Well when i got
that, i cried and cried. and then called Bruno. She came
right down here and told me everything was gonna be alright
and all the nice shit you say when yer friend is crying. I
love 'er to death! I never cried over a boy so much in my
life. Ive never even cried over joel, the kid i 'love'. I
guess its just the fact that he rejected me, ive never been
rejected before in my life, not once. its something im not
used too, but ill get over it, eventually.
Well marc went down the park today, and i wanted to go so
bad but i feel like an ass for pouring my heart out and
having it stomped on. So i stayed here with Bruno. and we
walked around and talked about shit, and she listened to me
while i cried. Carmie told me marc read my diary, well if
your reading this marc "FUCK YOU". He totally fucken lead
me on. like this one day i was drunk off my ass and he
didnt have a problem kissing me or going up my shirt did
he? ( and yes i do remember some stuff ) Well if thats not
leading you on, i dont knoe what is. Well fuck him. ill get
over it, someday. I got pleanty of guys who would love to
go out with me, i dont fucken need him. But i just hope we
can still be friends. i want shit to go back to the way it
was before i had my heart stomped on. but i dunno its up
to him. And he apparently thinks its just a crush, well
maybe it is, i dunno but ive never cried over a so-
called 'crush' before, as long as i could remember anyways.
Well brunos sleeping over ( lol her and my 20-year old
bro keep flirting and shit, its funny ) so imma bounce.
... Gurls if ya read this write me back ... i need help.