daydream disbeliever

Mad Ramblings From a Blithering Idiot
2002-07-13 06:11:29 (UTC)

Vin Diesel Is Not Sexy

I've tried, several times in as many days, to write an
entry only to be kicked from the piece of rotting feces
known as AOL.

I've been quite apprehensive about a new person in my
life. Tyson, Steph's cousin in the Navy, returned to
Portsmouth for a few days. And who did he make it a point
to spend most of his time with? Take one guess...even
though it's a bit embarasssing. He acted like a complete
gentleman and treated me like a princess. I don't know how
to deal with that. It's a bit unnerving when someone takes
me out on a date and doesn't even kiss me. However, Nikki
and Nikki say that that's the way I should be used to
feeling. I realize this of course, but every other guy
I've dated couldn't keep his hands off me when it was time
to say goodbye. We spent Friday night together and went to
L's party, which I'm very sorry to say sucked. We drove
around (he has the most badass car) and he let me drive his
car. I took it to 120 on 73 and I must say that I've never
had such a rush in my life. We did nothing but talk and
ride around all night long. And like I alluded to before,
I was a bit shocked when he dropped me off without so much
as hug.

I was shocked also on Sunday evening when he called me
and asked if I wanted to go out, especially since he was
leaving Monday morning. We got milkshakes and drove and
talked some more. He's really sarcastic and a bit of a
smartass, but so am I so it's ok. I really like talking to
him. I decided to make a move by giving him a hug goodbye
when he dropped me off. Still no kiss. But when he called
me Tuesday evening from South Carolina I was very happy.
We talked for quite some time. My friends and I figure
that he must like me at least a bit if he's calling me long
distance and hanging out with me more than his own family.
Hrm. He's supposed to call me within a few days. I wonder
if he will because our last conversation ended awkwardly.

Last but not at all the least before I retire for the
evening-L's dad died Monday morning. I went to the funeral
yesterday. It just about killed me to see someone I loved
so much suffering and there was no way I could help her.
So I listen. And listen. And listen some more. That
seems to help her-just to have someone to vent to and just
hear her out. So if that's all I can do, then by heaven
I'll do it. This evening I hung out with her. We went to
Jamie's and played with Bre^anna. She's so chubby and
cute, but I must say that she's not half as adorable as
Ivan. Ivan Gage is my baby. At least I wish he was. He's
absolutely perfect in every way, and I might be his
godmother instead of N. I do not want there to be any rift
between myself and the only cousin I'm remotely close to,
but it's NP's choice, not mine. And since I'm a baptized
Catholic, well... I won't think about that much. It's a
double edged sword that I'm afraid to tread upon, let alone
think about.

With that I bid myself adieu. Bonne nuit.