marinabreeze

as the Oval turns
2001-06-28 16:16:36 (UTC)

"sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" and other myths

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those
who love it will eat its fruit." Proverbs 18:29

Song of the season: It's Gonna Get Better - Genesis

I was in bed last night, just thinking about stuff, like
about how I've gotten to this point. It sort of scorches
my pride to have a dude get to me like. I've been hurt
before, don't get me wrong, but not like this. My ex-bf
never got this close...I think that it's b/c it was back in
the day when I had a shell of steel. Yeah, so I've liked
the same guy for most of the time I've been in college (I
just finished my sophomore year and I'm technically a
junior), since basically November of '99, so that makes it
over a year and a half that I've liked the same man yet
we're not together and never have been. At the least it's
embarrassing and at the worst shameful. And it's not b/c
he looks good, it's more b/c I like his personality and
unlike most dudes, I feel extremely comfortable around
him. It's like I can have intelligent conversations with
him, and at the same time he's a lot of fun to hang and
chill with...you don't meet dudes like that everyday...I'm
20 and it's taken me this long to meet one. But has it
worked out? Yes and no. I think it's cool that we're
friends...to his credit, he's probably the only dude that,
after me telling him I like him and he saying he just wants
to be friends, that he's been for real about it and didn't
just say it to blow me off like I've had happen to me a lot
in the past. However, deep down inside, I wish that we
could be more than that. I mean, he would make a cool
boyfriend...I think. I mean, some people make great
friends but sucky boyfriends (I know from experience), but
it would be cool if we could at least see what happens from
making things a little bit different. But it looks like
there's more of a chance of pigs flying than him seeing me
in any way other than "just friends." :( Oh well, c'est la
vie.