Mista Of Silent Death

Ramblings of the Mad and Distrubed
2002-07-07 15:07:32 (UTC)

Hurting.........

Well today my friend yiz and her girl friend are gonna
finsih moving.. Yeah i havent told you about them as of
yet.. Yizzen formaly known as Issac is a transgender
female, for those who dont know what that is it means that
she is getting a sex change a woman trapped in a mans
body.. I know this wont make sense but she is getting a sex
change so that she can sleep with other woman so she wants
to be a lesbien.. Heehe i know i find that retarded to but
hey to each there own,, who in the hell am i to judge...

I awoke from nasty dream again this morning.... Sleeping is
something i used to enjoy but now i am racked by horrible
nightmares, and sad thoughts of susicide like if i died
tomorrow who would miss me i would see my burial and no one
came and the tomb stone says my name and what a horrible
person i was in life and stuff like that,,,,,,,,,,,

But anyways on to something else i hate to be yelled at and
i asked the wrong question at the wrong time my roomate ken
was playing a game and i asked a retarded question as i
normaly do trying to sound intrested in what he is doing
cos eventually i will be alone and i want some memories of
things me and him talked about besides how fucked up i
am ... but that a different story i will go into later....
umm anyways well i asked him about one of his charaters on
ever quest and why he made it and i said why make another
one when you have like 50 and he was YELLED at me i dont
hav 50 i have like 6 and i was like oh ok shit what the
fuck did i say damn........... pardon my languge but
sometimes i have no idea why i even try to talk to anyone
becos everyone finds me annoying and retarded most of the
time anyways so there for they are gonna get pissed and
yell at me all the time so why the fuck do i bother at all
you know why i do its becos i love some of these people and
within myself deep deep down i know that they might love me
too.............


anyways that enough for today ill write more later Mistra


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