the life of a not so perfect KT girl
2001-06-27 18:51:46 (UTC)

i found him



okay can u believe finally i found the guy that has
everything i want .. and i mean everything .. but he is not
kicker .. whoa right .. I mean this guy who we will call
mr. perfect in everyway contact i have with him is on here
and to think i can't have him makes me soo mad that i can
barely see .. i mean why is it that when i finally find
what i am looking for in a guy .. he has to live like
however many thousands of miles away .. humm so like ne
ways he is so smart .. and careing .. and the fact tht he
is way cute does not really matter i just have to say that
for like all u people who only care about that .. I meanI
found him he did not find me .. and like i dunno ever since
then i am like" humm there is something i like about this
guy !"
I mean like he is such good conversation and like he is not
afraid to take chances and he does not really have any
annoying stuff about him .. its like i look for something
wrong in a person to make me like them less and i have
found a veryu few people who i consider almost flawless and
he fits into that catagory .. he has this dark mysterious
thing going for him and it makes me want him even more ..
humm i know like what all this sounds like .. lust right ..
well maybe i duno i am not claiming love or anything ..
just a strong like.. humm its odd what did he call it ..
imparative .. humm well i guess

okay so ne ways now that i have gotten that out of my
system .. Bubba is suppose to be coming over thursday and
like i am kinda scarred and i feel kinda bad i have missed
out on 2 morning practices in a row its just i can not get
myself up in time for them .. i know i klnow alarm clock
right well that does not work i sleep right through it ..
so iu guess i will have to find another like way to get
up .. okand now about my family which are coming down very
and i do mean VERY soon .. like i am excited to see them
its just i can not really deal with the oldest boy ..
Jordan for too long or i am gonna hold his head under water
until he is a vegetable .. i mean for real though i cannot
stand him he is too rambunctius for me .. i am like " i
wanna lay down " and Jordan is like " lets go and break
McCall's cheerleading troffies " I can say I dislike that
kid so much but like his little brother is cool he is like
5 and is really calm i can deal with him .. but like here
itis .. i am 16 and i am seriously thinking i have a major
anger problem .. i have to need to rage on anything and
anyone lately like i have so much that is being kept from
me and i feel deprived ! I hope to god i don't nd up being
a rage-a-holic!.. humm there still maybe hope .. isn't what
all those I just recovered from heroin addicts say ..
there still maybe hope ..
humm u see i am kinda odd in the since of like i try to
analize things too much like things can not just be things
to me .. like Dee can not just be Dee she is a lonely ..
heart broken .. "I am still wanting my ex who left me to be
with a then at that time 15 year old gurl " .. woman ! do u
see where i am going with this !
I dunno i am gonna bounce .. : ) lates : )