... SheLL*z . LyFe ...
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2002-07-05 03:51:40 (UTC)

The Men in my Lyfe

Where in the hell do i find the men in my lyfe? What am i a
jerk magnet? i must be . heres what happened. I went to
Kirby Park today to see the fireworks & ride the rides &
shit. Eddie,the kid i was supposed to see there, well
as it turns out, he has a daughter & he fucken ignored me
the whole time cuz i guess his girlfriend or wife was there
with him. What right does he have to hit on me & hang on me
when he has a daughter and/or wife? Im telling ya, i can
really pick 'em. All the problems in my life have to deal
with men and im starting to get sick of these situations i
put myself in. I need to start going out with people my own
age instead of people older then me, but i cant help it,
all these 20 year olds just fucken attract to me. im too
young to be having these problems, i need a man who is
gonna treat me right, and i think i have found him, but he
dont knoe i like him in that way ( marc ). and i cant tell
him cuz i dont knoe what hes gonna say back. rejection is
my worst fear. Well ne way this nasty kid was hitting on
me today, then he called me a bitch when i shot him down,
im like yer nasty ( and he REALLY was ) !!!! Thats my other
problem, i go for looks. Guys who r hott & knoe it are the
worst guys ( no offence ) and those r the guys i find all
the time. I seriously need to get my act together. I need
to stop fooling around with guys just because i want to.
its only gonna end up bad for me. i knoe it is. people
already think im a whore, ( im not ) but seriously i dont
care what other people think about me. They have no affect
on my lyfe what-so-ever. They can continue thinking what
they want while i do my own thing. but ne way, imma go.
imma try n stop crying too, cuz Eddie isnt really nothing
to cry over. but the thing is i dont knoe if im crying
because i dont have eddie, or because i dont have marc. hm.
i think its eddie