mental illness, yes it is real..

isn't life grand ??
2002-07-02 20:51:10 (UTC)

Infiltrated, violated..and pissed.....

Where do I begin...this journal which was primarily for me
to vent in has been infiltrated by my lovely employer,
which is the reason that it is now on private. I had this
as an open journal because I never told anyone here at work
about it only Lisa knew about it, and i didnt think that i
had to worry about bein back-stabed over this. Well I WAS
WRONG !!! ---Someone here at work ( I believe that it was
my nosey super perfect fat co-worker [you knoww who you
are] )found out about this journal and went to the chief of
the department with his findings... I am certain that if
they try to use anything that i have written in here
against me that it would be a violation of my 1st
ammendment rights, but still I feel very violated to think
that this would happen. This is my personal place to vent ,
to get my anger and hurt out of my system. I know that i
would be much worse offf emotionally if I didnt have this
space to vent. and to be able to keep it and go back and
reflect on my moods lets me see how my mood swings go, and
hopefully i will eventually see a pattern and be able to do
more to keep myself in better control. but , not if people
keep stickin their noses into my personal business..
I talk to my counselor about things that bother me and she
does know about this journal, in fact I have printed out
several entries and given them to her.
If the Chief wants to start anything over this journal, he
had best be ready for a fught, i have gone head to head
with him in the past , and if i have to , i am more than
willing to go at it again. I hope that i hear something
positive from mt holyoke soon....
on another note, Jessica goes back home tommorow, and im
gonna miss her big time. it has been great havin her up,
and even though she will be commin back up in 2 more weeks
for a whole month, it hurts havin to let her go back home.
I think that if given that chance she would love to stay
and live w/lisa and I , mike & nicole... I doubt that that
will happen, but it is nice to dream....

that is all for now....

Mood - kinda meloncoly....