Jena's Rants
2001-06-25 20:13:14 (UTC)


The greatest deception is that of appearance,
for one may appear sweet and innocent and in
fact be quite the opposite. This leads to
quite a dilema though, for then how can we
learn to trust? Would paranoia take over,
perhaps unreasonably - thus causing a mechanism
of self destruction to each and every
relationship fostered? To seek out and find
what may quite possibly be your greatest treasure,
or your worst nightmare requires a certain amount
of risk. For that is what I am doing now and I am
frightened at the very thought of it, but at
the same moment I glide through all of it as if
I were programmed. Like I have been practicing
for this. I know what to expect a bit at a
time, but can appear as if I had no idea. It
is all so very natural now. My paranoia would
usually rest in the other person, but now I am
concerned about my own motives. Can I trust myself?
There is a battle being waged as we speak.
It is a battle of needs.