Mysterious Attitude
2002-06-26 22:31:47 (UTC)

A letter and poem

Last night (June 26,2002), after I got off tha phone with
George I decided to write him an another letter. I liked
what I wrote and decided to put it in here.

pages total: 5 (on front only)

2: George
4rm: Helena
Time/Date: 1:45 a.m./6-26-02
Reason: I'm thinking about you
Request: W/B ASAP
Relationship: Friends/Phone sex buddies
Demand: Call me more
Song: Someone to hold- 112
Place: My room on my bed
Mood: Horny, tired, & happy
Quote: "A gurl and a guy can be just friends, but at one
point or another they will fall for each other ... maybe
temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or
maybe forever."
Quote 2: "If you're naughty, go to your room. If you want
to be naughty, come to mine."

*Letter Starts*
---- Hey sweetie, wudd up?! Not
much here just listening to music and being horny. I
just "had fun" again. Hehe, I'm glad you called back, I
missed doing that with you. Damn, I don't know how you can
turn me on so quick! I don't think anyone else can turn me
on as much as you can. I have yet to figure out if it's a
good or bad thing yet. I guess it can be anything I want it
to be. I cheated on Paul & to be honest I don't give a damn.
Your probably right about me and him not lasting long. I
know we won't last long as long as I talk to you. Your
about on the same level as Justin. There's something about
you that keeps making me like you more and more. I fear
that you don't feel the same and will probably forget
about me. I hope that my fear don't become true. What
scares me more, when I don't talk to you it feels like I'm
going crazy, because I miss you so much. Your always on my
mind, almost as Justin. I always talk about you and the
smallest thing reminds me of you. There is nothing I can do
to stop or hide these feelings, believe me I've tried.
That's the only reason I find it so hard to talk to you
now, because I like you so much but I know we're just
friends and probably remain like that. I just wish maybe
one day we can over come all the things that's stopping
from happening. Such as you still liking Erica, you have no
idea how much that hurts me, but I know what your going
thru because I've been thru it and still going thru it. If
it wasn't for you I would still be tearing myself apart
over liking my ex Jack. I thought I would always have
feelings for him, but I was wrong, because you made me
forget about him. I mean I still think about him, but not
like before. Now I just look back at the happy times I had
with him and keep him in my mind to help me move forward. I
mean why go after something that faded away, when I can
look back to it and learn from it? It took me months to get
over him, but with your help I did it :) Now I can move on,
not ever totally forgetting about him, but not be depressed
over him. I hope that someway somehow you can do the same
think with Erica & Megan. I know I can't really help you,
but I hope that maybe you could find someone who could. If
it isn't me, It don't matter as long as your happy. That's
all I want is for you to be happy again.

Anyway, let me talk about something else.
Thanks for tonight & for everything. :) How is drivers ed
going for you? I bet it sucks having to wake up so early to
take it. Me hope you pass it with flying colors!

Well, I guess I should go it's 2:30 a.m. now
& I'm getting a little tired. So I'll talk to you later.
Bye 4 now, much love! xoxoxo

With a X n' a O i'm out like whoa,
Helena AKA Hele

*"I smile b-cuz I have no idea what is going on"*

*"Don't cry b-cuz it's over, smile b-cuz it happened."*

*"Frustrated b-cuz I can't tell if it's real.
Mad b-cuz I don't know how you feel.
Upset b-cuz we can't make it right.
Sad b-cuz I need you day & night.
Angry b-cuz you won't take my hand.
Irritated b-cuz you don't understand.
Disappointed b-cuz we can't be together.
But I still love you now & forever."*

Here is that poem I wrote on June 6th that I told you I
would send to you on the computer but never did.

A Love Untrue

When I first met you,
I kept wondering why not me?
What does she have that I don't?
My feelings for you grew stronger,
So did my bitterness.

You keep telling me about these other girls,
Can't you see your tearing me apart?
I'm looking for a love that isn't there,
That won't be there,
That can't be there,
A love untrue.

As all the things you say to me play back in my mind,
I cry myself to sleep at night.
All because of you.

You tell me that you like me,
But why is there always someone else?
Why can't it be just me?

I'm just looking for a love that isn't there,
That won't be there,
That can't be there,
A love untrue.

A love that I wish was true,
One that becomes stronger, not weaker.
One that won't fade away, one always there.

But it isn't there,
Won't be there,
Can't be there,
A love untrue.

This love untrue is getting to me,
I hope you realize it to.
It keeps on fading,
Fading until it should be no more.

When the day comes that you want me,
I can smile and say,
I'm sorry but the love untrue isn't here,
Won't be here,
Can't be here,
For I found something true.

Okay there it is, tell me what you think about it!

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