Unholy and Dirty and Beautiful Me
2001-06-23 06:20:21 (UTC)

maybe some faith would do me good

Last night ToF called me again, wanted to get together
before he goes away for the weekend to work and sounded
really dissapointed when I turned him down. Then he called
my cell again tonight but I missed the call as I was at
I'm not sure what to make of all this attention he's
throwing my way. I guess I should be happy, it's been
awhile since a guy showed so much interest in me in such a
positive way but at the same time we've only gone out twice
and the guy has been acting as if we're a couple. In fact
he actually complained "Well I guess I can't see you till
next Wednesday". All I said was "Okay." ;P
I think I've got some personal issues to deal with
concerning relationships. I can't help feeling like he's
too nice right now so I'm expecting that it's inevitable
that he'll turn into a major asshole. Totally based on past
bad experiences. Therefore, yes I do have issues.

Here's what I'm thinking...I can:
a) Believe that he will be a jerk some day and ignore all
of his calls.
b) Let this thing run it's course and risk getting hurt
c) Tell him what I'm thinking, why I'm thinking this and
see how he reacts. If he still wants to see me then maybe
there's a chance that he's worth the time.

So, what do I do now? Yes I'm asking for advice. If you've
got any I'd love to hear your input.