weezer2080

Ya know what my problem is?

I crave attention. Don't know why, I mean my family never
ignored me or made me feel badly in any way. I have always
been loved by them, and have no doubt that I always will.
So I don't know where this comes from. It's embarassing
and awful the ways that I come up with to gather this
attention that I want. Then, when I recieve the attention
that I need, I blow it out of proportion and attach
stigmas to it. For example, I'll believe I'm in love. And
it's not love at all, it's just the fact that someone is
paying attention. I'm talking about guys here, now that I
reread what I've written. I just don't understand myself.
Maybe I'm bored. Maybe I have low self-esteem (which I
do). Maybe I just want someone to hold me...

I miss Chris, and none of the above applies to him. I've
known him entirely too long for any of that to apply.

~L