My so called life...
2002-06-21 06:27:14 (UTC)


Mood: Uncomfortable
Listing: Lonestar - Not A Day Goes By

I've never felt so uncomfortable in my own room. I'm sitting
here with my ex-girlfriend, no more than 20 feet from me. I
know there was a period where there was no one else in this
world I trusted more than her. No one that I would rather
spend a day with than her. Now its hard to spend more than a
few minutes with her.

I sat as she talked with her boyfriend on the phone. I could
over hear her ask him if it was okay to stay. I heard her
repetativly ask if it was okay. I never wanted to be the ex.
The "ex-boyfriend." The guy you always asked yourself, hey
how the fuck could you have gone out with him. What the FUCK
did you see in him. I never wanted to be that guy and now I
find myself filling those shoes.

I miss her but not in that way. I miss the friendship we had
when we went out. She was my best friend and I lost that
with her. I sometimes wish we could just have that
friendship but there are too many strings attached. Anyways,
I've always put her happiness infront of mine. That is why
I'll be spending the night some where else tomorrow night. I
can't be here. Not with her here but at the same time I want
her to have fun. Well, Carrie enjoy yourself, for this will
be the last time I will allow myself to remenice about you.

I think its time I let you go. Its over. I don't want you
anymore. I don't need you anymore. Thanks for everything but
I'm not yours anymore. Good bye, Eun Gyoung.