Timothy

Shucking the bark...

Well,. I am still feeling quite awful.
could be another one of the days I
think again... just doing fuck all, and
lying around do, nothing...

It's 1:30pm, and I still don't know
what I am going to do this afternoon.
At 5pmish I am seeing a friend at the
Fuel Cafe. Going to sit on the patio
and yak about nothing, maybe about
him still being a virgin at 23, I so don't
know why, he's one of those pretty boi
I've got the german punker thing going.
Great guy, really nice, mm, maybe thats
why. He's too nice... Ya gotta wonder
why in the hell he's hanging around me?

I mean I am not the role model of the
world for upstanding humans or anything.
But, I guess, nice guys have to stick
together in this world... heh, heh..

So, I am sitting here, in my blacks shorts
looking at my black watch, peering over
my black ring, which lies over my black
t-shirt.... Black, all I own with 3 exceptions
my clothing is black. I own a light green
sweater, a dark green sweater and a nice
rayon, but still green dress shirt. I do own
3 pairs of shoes, 1 black, 1 brown, and big
black boots.Kind of makes you wonder huh?
If clothing is supposed to reflect your mood
then, I guess my moods are black, which is
quite in itself a good, clear mood.

But green? Now there is an interesting one.
Green has at times represented, envy, sickness
and come to think of it, the wilderness. So, my
green sweater, black pants, and brown shoes
kind of I guess make me rustic. Mmm, maybe not.

When I was living in BC, British Columbia, I would
go hiking around the woods, we lived on an
island called North Pender, it was great. One
summer, a few years ago, I basically slept in a
tent for two months, I could have slept in the
trailler or the house, but I didn't want to, even
when it was raining, I sleep in it. Looking at the
stars, through the plastic window as the rain fell.
It was quite relaxing, I didn't have any worries,
i could ride my bike into town and play galaxian,
or pinball, it was fun. The hills were killer tho, but
I loved it... I wish I could go there again....
I could I guess if I really wanted to, but I have so
much crap to deal with here... And besides, I'd like
to go to florida before I go anywhere else...

I really need to get my act together tho. I am
going to figure out this whole thing with
student loans, then try my damnedest to get
back to school, need a job tho first. Maybe I can
borrow some cash from my grandparents. Then
again, maybe not.... I have 13 days to come up
with $908.00, just so I can take 2 classes which I
know I will get A 's in, then go to student loans and
say, "Hey, see, I got the grades, I am not a fuckup. Now
gimme more money." Stupid thing is, they would go
"well, since you are such a good little boi, here, take
this and continue to do well." I would get a loan for
September and all would be well, I could even pay my
grandparents back. Or whom ever loaned me the money.
Shit, like thats going to happen. Keep dreaming Timbo...
Man, if ever I needed a faeri godmother/father now is it...

Now is the time of our discontent....

I have a will to power....

I set my mind in motion....

Time is the hunter...

Fashion is so aborhent....

Time. To. Die...

Carpe Diem...

AVE! Morituri te Salutant...