2002-06-20 03:46:56 (UTC)

June 19th 2002

He hasn't answered my email. I don't know if I really
expected him to. It's possible too that he might not have
read it yet as he doesn't check his email very often. I'm
thinking that odds are that he has read it by now and just
isn't going to answer. I guess I've done what I have to do
by answering him "why" cuz he apparently asked Léanne why I
was so mad at him and was saying how he "really wants to be
friends" with me and "doesn't like this not talking to each
other thing". So who knows. There's not much more that I
can do that I am willing to do. I kind of do think that we
need to talk - even if it's only about us not talking to
each other (as wierd as that is). But I'm not about to go
call him up about it either. It's just so wierd. I have
unresolved issues about this that I have to deal with. My
friends seem to think that we should talk about it, I guess
especially in light of the fact that it's been a month
since we broke up and we didn't ever talk about it. So I
dunno. He's the one that wants to be my friend he should
talk to me about it if it's such a big deal to him. He's
such a jerk too though - I mean, I can't really justify
being friends with him after the way he treated me. But at
the same time I'm still concerned about it him (sick as
that is) and I still think that there is something wrong
emotionally with him and for whatever reason I sorta feel
like I should do something about it despite all the
emotional problems I had as a result of the stupid things
he DID to me. Grrr. I don't like being a bleeding-heart.
It's better than being all bitter and jaded and self-
centred I guess but it just gets me in bad situations.