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2002-06-19 03:53:25 (UTC)


Before I continue, I have something else to say. Today at
my new job a met this other new guy. His last name was
Stewart but for the life of me I can't remember his first
name. Was it James? Anyway, he said he worked with her at
Honda. He said he frustrated her coz he got the early
shift. That was funny. By the way, I don't think I'm
gonna stay there. It's just not me. Besides, I may have
another job lined up. I'm gonna find out more tomorrow.
If neither work out then I'll probably be back at the
colony. Who knows? Back to our We saw
each other a couple more times but with less and less
frequency. I think coz she said she wanted to make a
descision and be 100% positive. Actually, we talked on the
phone more than anything. We tell each other what was
going on in our lives and share some laughs. One time she
asked me to actually meet her. We went to check out this
little house she was looking at. It was really cute and
she said it was perfect for her. Last I heard though, it
was too much for what it is. Later, we went to the park
and had another conversation. It was a beautiful day and
it was great being with her. She told me after that day
that she wanted to kiss me before I left but I seemed to
jump out of the truck. Missed oppurtunity. We met one
more time at the park. There she told me I probably
wouldn't hear too much from her right now. She said that
it has to be all about her. She can't be thinking about
me. I respectfully stepped aside. I can't help but think
that we might never be close again. Friends or otherwise.
Seems to me that she wants to move on with her life and I'm
trying to figure out if I'm apart of it. I've said and
will keep saying that I don't wanna lose her. Even if she
wants to keep it just friends, I don't wanna lose her.
Lately, I've found myself driving faster than I usually
do. It makes me wonder if she rubbed some of her on me. I
would love nothing better than to have a piece of her with
me. Makes me feel good about us. I love her. Lovers or
not, I love her. I hope shes safe and comfortable. I hope
she gets what she needs. I hope shes never too unhappy. I
hope I haven't seen the last of her. I hope that someday
we can reminicse together. THE END
Back to regular diary tomorrow.

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