Kitten’s Claw

Trivial Jargon
2002-06-16 23:36:55 (UTC)

Talking to myself... just grr... Don't do this to me

Always talking to myself...
I know.
Isn't there someone else you'd rather talk to?
I would, but there's no one online and the phone has never
been that appealing to me.
Yeah... I understand that feeling very well actually...
Just not sure what to do anymore... maybe it was a dream.
A dream?
Maybe it was all in my head.
Perhaps, but I doubt it this time...
The more I think that it could be, the more I just want to
let go of it... if it's not real and in my head... just,
why hold on to something that's not real?
Don't to this to me again...
Why? Do you wanna live in some virtual reality?
No... but it doesn't have to be that way.
It could be worse or better, right?
Yes, but we're wanting better at the moment.
We're always wanting better.
The more we want it, the harder it is to reach.
Are you taking steps back again?
I'm trying not to... no... I'm just stuck here.
I'm not always like this you know.
I'm not always like what?
So unbecomming and uncharming and stupid... at least I
never thought I was.
Don't worry, we know.
Are you sure you know?
No... I can't be sure of anything anymore, but I'm still me.
Yes, but please, just be careful... remember last summer
you were here, in this place?
Yeah... I thought it was all complete. That I had done
exactly what I needed to do and that there was nothing left
to actually do.
Exactly. You have so much ahead of you, don't do this to
me okay? Just relax and stop thinking.
Thinking always gets to me. I wish I were someone else.
I wish I were someplace else.
I wish I were happy.
I wish were too.
Yep.
Uh huh...
Finished yet?
No... I was just spacing out here...
Oh, okay... Please smile, just once okay?
Why? I don't really have any reason to right now.
*sigh* Fine...
Are you mad at me again?
Always...
Thought so...
Why are you so mad at yourself Cat?
Dunno... Always blaming myself for just being who I am.
So that's why you want to change, right?
I can change... I'd just rather keep the good parts of me
alive... unfortunately, if I do change... it seems to take
all of me and transform it all into someone else... none of
the good parts left.
Yeah... we've been there before... not worth it.
Nope.
Gunna draw some more now?
No, gunna write my music...
Well have fun.
What's that?
-_-* Oye
Oye ve...




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