Jackster

The Life of Jack
2002-06-16 15:54:58 (UTC)

BY JOVE I'VE GOT IT!!!!!

I finally figured it out!!! I can't believe that I'm so
stupid as to have not figured it out before, but now I know
why I can't get over Kira!!!!! I'M MENTALLY ILL!!!!! Now
before you take offense at that Kira, let me just tell you
this, it's not just you, I haven't gotten over ANY of the
girls I've EVER liked. I got to thinking about it last
night and I still like every single girl that I've ever
liked thanks to two little problems with my brain that I
like to call "Consider-girls-you-like-as-angels" syndrome
and "Never-get-over-those-girls" syndrome, catchy huh?
Anywho, putting the two together makes it where any girl I
ever like can do no wrong, meaning that no matter what they
do unless it's REALLY wrong, I'll still like them, and I
don't STOP liking them as time goes on. So that basically
means that I now like Kira, Tiffany, 2 different Emily's, 3
different Ashley's, Tiffany, Amanda, Casey, Jeniefer,
Becky, and Kristen.....ALL OF WHOM HAVE REJECTED ME!!!!!
*Insert maniacal laughter here* Wow, for some reason I
actually feel better now, maybe it's just getting rid of
that confusion, now I can focus on JUST being depressed
over that rather large list instead of depressed AND
confused. For those of you just now tuning in, Jack's
completly flipped, BUT THAT'S OK!!!!! *Pant pant* Well now,
I can actually feel my brain liquifying, but it's nice to
know that this whole "continuing to like Kira" thing isn't
isolated, I've just never hung out with the person who
rejected me before, I usually avoided them like the plague,
or a giant spider, well, besides Ashley, who I joined
Madrigals for simply to impress, only to have it suck my
life into it. You know, my life would be SO much simpler if
I had just never sent that e-mail back in February, it
would have been a stupid little crush and that would be
that, my life would be boring and I would be a very lonely
man. As it is, my life is now leaving me here standing in
the dust wondering what the Hell is going on and I'm still
lonely, just in a different way. But at least the confusion
is gone, so maybe I can downplay this whole attraction to
kira, I have for everyone else and I'm guessing that most
of it is just me letting my imagination run wild. Blah. I
need to talk to someone about this. Still no response from
my e-mail person, but I think she lives in Burlington,
which sucks if you ask me, if she even exists at all, I
wouldn't be suprised to learn that this is just some big
joke some butt munch played on me. *Reads over entry he
just typed, then cringes* Holy crap, I HAVE lost it, at
least I'm not suicidal or homicidal like LAST time i went
insane, I got rid of my "To Kill" list a long time ago and
I don't have anyone to blame for the mess I am now but
myself anyways. *Sigh* Whatever, when college comes I'll be
too busy to be insane anyways, I've decided that I'm going
to be in the Concert Band, HOPEFULLY Wind Ensemble
(although I'm not holding my breath, flute's competitive),
the UNCG Chorale, the Men's Glee Club, the Chamber Choir,
and the Flute Choir, not to mention any drama stuff I
decide to do, so Jack's throwing his life away to music for
a year, probably 5 years.... Nyeh, nobody will miss me
anyways, I discovered that when I went into my funks. I've
noticed that when anybody else gets into a funk, everybody
stops everything they're doing to try to cheer that person
up, but when I get in a funk, nobody cares/notices except
for one or two people who get mad at me and tell me to suck
it up. Hmph, when Matt went into a funk people crowded
around him and told jokes while Kira comferted him, when I
went into a funk, nobody noticed except Kira who got
indignant at me and said that i was no fun when I was in a
funk. Blah, this is still insane Jack, sane Jack would
never actually write this and knows that this isn't true,
but insane Jack's at the controls right now. I know what
you are all thinking, and while I may be schizophrenic, at
least i have each other!!!! *Insert Manical Laughter here*
*Gasps for air* *Takes deep cleansing breath* There, I got
it out of my system, and put it on display because I know
all you people whose lives revolve around reading OTHER
people's lives will enjoy reading that. I guess that's it
for now, I've found my song from Les Mis, "Empty Chairs and
Empty Tables", I always seem to choose sad songs, my song
from RENT is Collin's refrain of "I'll Cover You" after
Angel dies. Wait, my other songs are "Gee Officer Krupke"
and I can't seem to find a song in Aida that screams
out "JACK!!!" to me yet. *Shrugs* I've really rambled in
this entry haven't I? I'm gonna get my Oaklies today, I
wonder what Katie's done with my Foaklies? I hope she
hasn't thrown them away, that would just be wrong. I'm now
going to stop myself from continuing this post before it
gets any weirder. Hehe, I bet all you people who don't know
me and just clicked on my journal for the fun of it are
thoroughly confused now, well, GOOD!!! YOU SHOULD BE!!! And
so my work here is done. Until I type again.

~Jack




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