Why 1 Bollus?

the thoughts and recollections of me
2002-06-15 21:39:54 (UTC)

Love thats gone

Once I fell in love, but I didnt realise it until it was to
late. I saw her, and I knew that it could be something
great. You get those feelings sometimes, you could just be
out walking and from the corner of your eye you will see
someone and they will be looking at you, and you just know
that theres a interest, an electricity between you both, of
course nothing ever comes from it, we get possibilities of
love everyday, and we just walk past, we ignore what could
be a wonderful future, what could be a heaven just
waiting. What do we do? we walk on past.

My girl however, the girl i loved. I saw her everyday, I
saw her on the train at the same time everyday. While
waiting for the train I would stand less the 10 metres away
from love, 10 metres and a 'Hello' away from my heaven.
But it became easy, it became easier just to stand there
and wait for the glances, the moments when our eyes would
met. I would wait for the looks, and love looking at her,
thinking that I would always have tomorrow to talk, today
was just a looking. But I never spoke.

I thought I would always see her, I was wrong. She went
away, and I havent seen her since. Only now do I realise
what I have lost. I have lost love. Of course there are
millions of girls in this world. There is more then 1 girl
in this world right for me. But so far the only girl I
have ever felt so much connection with is this one girl,
and I let it slip past me.

I find myself doing things and thinking about her. I
remember how I used to watch her on the train, and her lips
would sort of pout outwards as she was in deep thought, I
remember how she would sit and stare at the backs of her
fingers. She was probably unconsious on this, something
that she does all the time. I am sure I too have always
done the same things, but only recently, do I find myself
thinking about her everytime I look at the backs of my
hands, I think and wonder what was on her mind. I even
find myself making the same facial expressions, sometimes I
do it unconsiously and doing so will remind me of her.
Sometimes however I will be looking in a mirror and I will
try getting her pout just right. I will pout trying to
catch a glimpse of her in the mirror.

I let this love pass me by, I know their will be other
loves in my life, but she will always hold a part in my
heart. Sometimes I catch the train, and just hope to see
her again. One day, I hope I will see her again. I won't
fear love this time.




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