2002-06-13 05:27:35 (UTC)

it took a cup of coffee.. to prove that you dont love me...

hm. what a long day... last night after work i went out
with people from work, dave bought everyone free drinks
and shit like that.. christina came and that was okay, she
spent the night and this morning we went to breakfast and
met up with maria and betsy... that was kinda weird, like i
didnt know what to say... i havent seen her in so long and all.. but
anyway... then we went with gus and naomi to the beach, that was
pretty much fun... the waves were really strong and i slept for an
hour or so.. it was nice.. that guy from work called.. bbbblllehhh...
im so over that shit. im glad tomorrows my last day ish... i hope
late shift works out well for me, so i can stay doing that for
awhile... until i find something else or maybe i'll really like it
and stay for longer than i expect... anyway... yeah so i came home
and took a shower and i guess i went and had coffee with matt.. that
was definetly weird... hm. i called him today to see if he wanted to
come to the beach and he had just gone on his break.. and he said
tonight that when i called, he had just been thinking about me but he
didnt remember what.. and later he said he was thinking how sad it
was that things got so messed up with us.. yeah no shit. fuck yeah
its sad... you know.. what ever... im of course a little weird now,
but im guna try to not really think of it.. he said again that
whole "we never know whats going to happen" thing.. but i have to
think that thats very likely his way of stringing me along for
whatever reason... i wish i could think he misses me but i really
dont know anymore.. today i listened to his whole cd on the way back
from the beach...i thought about him a lot today, i have been for a
couple days i guess, since i read that thing on his profile... but
thats not a good plan so.. either way, im really tired and i dont
want to think about it.. it was nice though, we just talked and no
fighting, not really much akwardness... i will not miss him. i will
not fall back down.
im going to go to bed and try to sleep no thinking tonight...