2002-06-11 01:48:55 (UTC)

whispering you stare, wanting you dont care...

kiss me make me cry, how did i wind up here...

yeah.. i was very angry earlier... im better now... i'm at
work and its so boring... i still miss him a little bit,
but.. well.. anyway.. just. what is his fucking point. those
pictures by the computer and that thing on his profile, fuck him.
for real.

i dont like the other one so much anymore... im bored with it,
nothings happening and he probably sucks anyway.

dawns in mexico... sniff... i miss her. im really going to miss her
when she goes...
i think im guna work the late shift at work... like 12midnight-8am.
i think it would be great, cus like, no one would be here to piss
me off, and i could get so smart, reading stuf online and working on
stuf cus its not busy and yay, id like it. id never see that guy but
i dont really care, hes dumb, like i said.
this guy at work is really bothering me... i really cant stand him..
hes a cocky, disgusting, ghetto esque fucking ughhghhghghhhhhhhhhhh
hes really upsetting me... "i think faggots should burn" and shit
AGGHHHH!!! i really hate boys.

i miss ashley too. fucking, things are so different now. like
everything has changed so much... richard and caroline and ashley and
matt and claudia are gone... claudia and richard arent really gone,
but mostly, like i never see them... and its so sad... i mean,
christinas great, and gus and i are getting to be good friends, i
love robin and chaz.. but yknow.. its just different.. im not so good
with change and i feel like a lot has changed... i need projects..
kickboxing.. scrapbooking.. i want to learn how to cook.
im so fucking lonely... like i really need to find someone to take
care of me... its so sad, cus i really SHOULDNT... i should say i
really need to find strength in myself and support myself live for
myself, but no.. thats not what i really want.. or what im really
looking for.. but i feel like now that i want it i'll never find it..
well anyway... i guess i'll go.. find some work to do...