AngeL w/o WinGs

-=-My So Called Life-=-
Ad 0:
2002-06-09 05:19:41 (UTC)

Why am i never satisfied....

Ok, so I have an amazingly incredible boyfriend named Sean.
He goes to a h.s. near mine, and lives like 20min. away, so
it's kinda hard to see him. Last weekend when we were
supposed to do something, he fell asleep n didnt wake up in
time. Then this Friday we were supposed to go to the
movies, but he had to go to his dad's house last minute,
and he couldnt help it, and i was just soo....let down(even
tho he visited me at work thursday), i actually cried
myself to sleep and woke up around 7pm friday, and me
marisa n erin hung out at corey n robs house. then yeah, i
didnt talk to him on the phone cuz i didnt know what to say
cuz i shouldnt be mad. so i talked to him today and we're
ok, and he feels really bad, and yeah....i always feel
like, oh its going away, but then i finally finally SEE him
and i am just left breathless, so i really like
him. then again....i met this boy John-o at my friend
Jessie's Sweet 16 at her house today, and he's a frosh, but
supposed to be a soph., hes a LaX player, and he's
HOTTTTTTTTT. he really is, and we kinda clicked, but jessie
really likes him, and i really have a bf i adore, so i will
forget i ever met him. THEN me and andrew jasko just had a
long convo, and the slight flirtation was still there and
he gets his licence in july, and well it will be cool
hanging out with him again, he wants to go to great
adventure...but once again i proclaim i really like my bf,
i just need to see him again...need to BE WITH HIM. we are
going to a sweet 16 on friday, and i'm getting my hair all
done up and he's wearing his cute blue dress shirt, and ooh
i can't wait! it'll be absolutely to die for. and he dances
at parties! woohoo! but why do i keep thinking of these
other possibilities? is it b/c sean doesnt give me all i
need and i'm looking for that elsewhere....or am i just
addicted to that "pre relationship sparks" or am i just
committmently challenged (god damn that f*ing matt sharpe).
he did this to me. anyways, i have to work tomorrow. by the
way my only friend at work quit, grrrrrr. anyways, i'll be
goin now, nightie nightzZz