Christine

Visions Of Life
2002-06-05 21:36:04 (UTC)

Christian Porn

6-5-02
3pm

No job yet. I hope he doesnt bitch at me for not looking
today. I have been through the paper and have been all
around here. i cant do anything more at the present time. i
finally put oil in my car. Yay! Now i just need to get the
muffler fixed and hopefully my car wont be acting as weird.

I look quite cute today. Im wearing a gray conservative
type blouse, unbuttoned half way so my breasts and bra show
if i move a certain way. My sleeves are rolled up and im
wearing spiked bracelets.i have glitter on my eyes and
breasts and neck.Im wearing a long black skirt tho i want
to wear a short one but i cant find my conservative short
skirt and i cant play in my hooker length black skirt cuz
ill flas hmy pussy to the whole bar. Anyways.. Im a bit
obsessive about myself today.. lol

Okay. As promiced, i will elaborate on Christian porn since
I said Bush watches and collects it..lol.. Warning. This
will probally offend someone so... yeah..

Christian porn is material used by Christians and
republicans for masterbation... It is considered
"wholesome" and "family oriented". By this i mean all the
scenes involve family members but only the "married"
couples have actual intercourse. Keep in mind that,
according to the church, anal and oral sex are not
considered actual intercource and a person can be a virgin
but be an anal sex slut. Wait.. Ive said to much and am so
going to hell.. Wait.. I dont believe in hell so i cant go.
Score one for me! Muahahaha

**I am not implying that Christians and republicans are
incest crazy pedaphiles so dont go after me for my morbid
sence of humor**

I am so obsessed with watching Passions. Its getting so
good and i just have to watch it. If you have a problem
with that, you can write to my lawyer.

I am still in a weird mood. Not sure why.

I need a job so i can be with him and not worry about him
freaking out on me about the job issue. I havnt lied to him
about anything. He just hasnt given me the chance to
actually speak. Im hoping we can spend the net 2 days
together and not fight. I cant take another fight right
now. I cant take anything, actually. I am so fragile but
hide it well.

Did I mention i cut myself on my right arm the other day in
an attempt to piss him off. That was also when i broke up
with him.. Didnt mean to do that but i was so upset and
spent hours building up the upsetness and even tho i didnt
have that much of a right to be upset, the combination of
fear and upsetness (is that a word?) took away my judgement
and i went nuts. Then, when i was able to think, i felt
like an idiot fro breaking up with him so i took it back..
lol.. When im upset i say things i dont mean.. I cant
imagine living without him. I really really really need to
control my emotions or at least curl up in a ball until i
can think again. The things he puts up with.. The things i
put up with. *playful sigh* Id rather be slightly
disfunctional with him then be alone because alone im a
raging psychopathic whore who is suicidal half the time and
the other half, acts slutty... My lil month of being single
kinda proved that.. I dont mind being a slut but i want to
be a slut with my boyfriend, not random people. Ive only
slept with like 10 guys and 2 girls so im not a real slut
in terms of numbers. I think the current table of slutism
classifys sluttism as 30 partners for a 19 year old. Im at
the level of playful vixen who needs to avoid drinking in
social situations unless wearing a steel chastity belt or
accompanied by a boyfriend or a trustworthy male
bodyguard... Im on crack. Im freaking out in a twisted way.
Im off to buy catfood and am going to attempt to shake off
this weirdness or let it blossom into a hideous flower of
insanity. Ta ta