kiss me, kill me, hold me, thrill me
2002-06-02 20:29:36 (UTC)

Friday night

Ok, I've been talking about this big night and hanging out
with Dave. He arrived around 1 like he said he would. We
got espresso and went for a walk. It was easy to talk to
him...not that I thought it would be really hard though.

We spent a good bit of time walking around. Cal and her
friend M. were around. M. has talked to Dave a few times
online. She was in a touchy feely mood. She gave me a
big hug when she first walked up and gave Dave a bigger
hug when she and Cal took off for a bit.

Dave and I walked over and emptied out my locker. When we
got back we thought Cal was gone so we left her a message
and went for a drive. We sort of talked about the other
night. He surprised me and said he'd never had a
conversation quite like that before. I had to admit I
have, but never with a guy who has a brain.

The drive was a lot of fun. We took a back road around
here and he floored it. He kept bringing up little bits
of the other night which at first was strange.

We came back and Cal drove the three of us to the Tav. I
had a beer with my burger. Cal didn't drink and Dave had
two beers. He even picked up the bill which I hadn't

We came back here and called M. She came over and we
started drinking. I had a bit over half a bottle of
Bacardi Gold and lots of coke. I had a couple cups rum
and coke. I started to fill my glass, but left to go
pee. When I got back Dave had filled it and it had more
rum than coke I think.

We had fun getting drunk. I didn't think I was drunk at
first. I thought I was tipsy, but soon it kicked in.
Dave and I had talked about that night and not doing
anything. We didn't do much. We held hands and he kept
touching my legs.

The thing is he talked a lot about the song Gillette- Does
Anybody Wanna Have Sex Tonight. That was the song I say
started our sexual conversation last Wednesday. So...he
had to play it Friday night. And he kept glancing at me
during that time too. He was sitting like right next to
me...I mean like there was no room in between us.

Nothing happened between us, but if he hadn't stayed in
Cal's room it could have. I really wanted to lay with
him. I have a strong feeling I would have made out with
him if he had wanted to.

I finally left Cal's pretty late and went to lay down.
Then I felt like I had to puke. I managed to make it to
the toilet in time to puke. I threw up twice and then
went to bed.

Dave had to leave around 7am to get home and have his
internet installed. I got up and started to say bye to
him. He did his whole head motion thing. He motions with
his head and I knew it meant he wanted me to follow him
out to his car.

Oh, he hugged me before bed. He hugged me at his car
too. That was really cool. To tell you the truth I had
hoped he would. I've wanted to hug him for a long time,
just never had a chance to. He's been such a good
friend. He did manage to drive home and not fall asleep
at the wheel or anything.

He was dog tired. I did not have any sort of hang over at
all. I was a bit surprised.

Yesterday John came over like planned. I thought I
screwed up on Friday night. I told him Dave had dropped
by and left Cal and I some boxes. Then there was a super
long pause. I thought he was pissed off. He didn't seem
to care. Infact he didn't ask what we did or anything.

He did make the joke again that if I left him I'd go to
Dave. I don't see why he has to make that comment like
every other time I see him. Oh well.

Cal seems to think that John treats me a bit like a
child. She says he doesn't let me think for myself. I
don't see that... She also said I don't smile as much
when he's around. I think I act normal around him.

Oh well. I just hope she isn't seeing something that
really is there. Dave seemed to think that I'm not as
expressive when I'm with John. That could be true I
guess. I don't feel that way though.

I did notice that Dave and I did more talking in the car
on our drive than John and I did on our drive yesterday.
It was a comfy silence when John and I didn't talk. WIth
Dave it wasn't as comfy since we haven't talked as much.

I am very glad nothing happened on Friday. I don't know what I
would do if something did happen. I mean even if a bit
more happened than did... I guess I don't need to think
about that. Nothing happened, end of story!!!

For now...