am_I_human

more human than human
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2002-06-02 09:43:52 (UTC)

Technical Difficulties

During a rather insightful conversation with a good friend,
I was told that there are two kinds of "goth" guys when it
comes to dating which make my finding a goth guy pointless,
due to my lack of commitment, but wanting of caring: over-
passionate, or assholes. Ouch. Maybe I WILL stick to my
idea of "lesbian until further notice."But I guess my
demands, to some, make me a slut. Oh well...I guess I'll
just sit around and be what I'm afraid of; alone. It's no
one's fault, except possibly my own. I hate being alone,
but I don't want anyone close. My mind seems to be set on
self-destruct,; I've been letting the tiniest
disappointments get me down far to much. Metaphorically
speaking, all I need is a teddy bear. Think about it: teddy
bear's are perfect. They're always there when you need a
cuddle, or to vent, but they don't care what else you do.
They never complain about anything, but they're always
there when you need them. Now why can't I find a teddy bear
who happens to wear fishnet and eyeliner; and look great in
it too? I guess all those things they say about men are
true:
-they're like parking lots, all the good ones are taken and
the rest are handicapped
-they're like a blender; you know you need one, you're just
not sure why
-they treat you like mushrooms; left in the dark and fed on
bullshit
-It only takes one man to screw in a lightbulb cuz men will
screw anything
-like a blender; easy to turn on, and they always make a
mess

And I'm sure I'll think of more. Until then, I curl up
alone in the dark, wishing my mind didn't hate me.

~Acid


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