Dave's Mental Meanderings
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Poem - "The Place in My Head"
In a realm where one’s nature neither honors nor forgives,
Parallel to that in which a judging man lives,
I depart for a moment from my thoughtless repose
As the weary morning pearl so eerily glows.
Left far behind in a bed with a view
Lies a woman whose sighs match her eyes’ gentle hue,
The warm contentment that escapes from her sleep
Betrays her true passion, majestic and deep.
Surely she was never intended for this place,
These ruthless surroundings, so devoid of grace,
She must succumb to no forces and live by no laws,
Like a tigress with eyes that cut deeper than claws.
I dare not disturb her silent submission,
I dare not cross that astral partition.
How free and unburdened must be her mind’s eye,
To assuage my apprehension I fruitlessly try.
I let my mind wander without any purpose,
Questions I’ve asked a hundred times start to surface.
What indeed has God wrought upon us,
So far from these questions his reflection has drawn us.
Questions without answers, like where am I going?
Who am I killing, who am I knowing?
Why am I fasting, why aren’t I slowing?
Why can only she see my soft spot showing?
Her eyes, how ethereal they are when they’re glowing,
I want to take her away on a big fat Boeing,
Take her to a place where there are no prying eyes,
No pseudo-pious tongues to curse and criticize,
No greedy eyes on some gaudy prize,
No more questions so I can stop telling lies,
No more prostitute priests and flipped-out phonies,
No more schoolgirls screaming “Fuck me, I’m lonely,”
No more suffering by the swords of the soldiers,
No more sultry sirens’ songs or tumbling boulders,
No more broken bones from beating on bricks,
No more backaches just from picking up sticks,
Just a place where honor and truth reign supreme,
Where I can see in her face that unsullied gleam,
Where she can dance with rivers and make love to the sky,
Where she loves me for failing where at least I try,
Where some day, more perfectly that I will in this land,
I can slide my future right onto her hand,
And as I gaze up at her face with my knee in the dirt,
With a hole in my jeans and a stain on my shirt,
I’ll tell her what she’s heard a million times over,
I ain’t nobody’s bargain, like a one-leaf clover,
But if it costs me my pride, my soul, or my life,
I will protect and defend her as my friend and my wife.
Bound together by our thoughts, our hearts and our hands,
Without signing on a line such as this world demands.
But if I traveled a million miles today,
That place would still be too far away,
Too far away from the cold iron grip
Of a world that trips you and makes you slip,
Makes you stumble and fall face-first in the dirt,
And pins you down ‘till your bones start to hurt,
Too far away from this minefield planet
That waits ‘till you’re halfway through the door to slam it,
Hangs you up by your feet in the scorching sun,
And when you finally escape, you’re too tired to run,
You just fall to the ground screaming curses to the air,
Shouting in vain, “Doesn’t anybody care?!”
That place is too far from the place I call home,
But there ain’t nothing better to do than just roam.
Many mountains I must climb, through caves I must creep,
But for now I will join her back on Earth in her sleep.
When she wakes up tomorrow beside me in bed,
She’ll know nothing of my journey to the place in my head,
She’ll simply lean closer, my lips she will kiss,
If I never find that place, then let me die like this.