2002-06-01 05:19:47 (UTC)

i like you...

but i know you dont know it
i like you so much i talk to everyone but you
and i wonder what you would say if you knew...

blah blah blah. my fucking entry last night didnt send.
that really sucks it was long, i was up late... i went and
saw caroline and she was a total bitch.. like everything
she said was everything ive been trying not to think about
myself.. i did good though. i got up and left and didnt
start crying until i got in my car. fuck her. its like she
was TRYING to act like matt. i hate people so much.
anyway... i couldnt sleep then. i talked to that guy tom.
hes pretty cool. claudia and i went shopping today and
went to work.. i almost had the balls worked up to talk to
todd more, try not to be such a bitch, try not to
say "fuck off" to everything.. but he completely ignored
me... when they left i was smoking and i talked to them for
a minute but. claudia has too much faith in me, i really
need to let it go. im so stupid.
poor gus.. hes all upset and i feel so bad.. and it sucks.
i love dawn but i really feel bad for him sometimes.. it
sucks to be on his end of this shit, and on my end of this
shit... like with matthew.. and theres no easy way to
say "fuck it." for some people, there is, but not for
people like me.
whats on my mind tonight... i dont really know. i got into
it with jakky again and left work.. i met a ton of people
at dennys and some of us went and saw insomnia... it was
okay. saw sebastien and alli.. and finally saw christina.
everything is so simple to her... it reminds me of
richard. that was always so irritating... lack of
complication and confusion... how do they manage it.
i think i need to sleep.