The mediocrity that is me
If you're planning on eating it, and it looks disgusting, whatever you do, DONT SMELL IT.
I woke up today and no longer felt like puking up
everything i had ever eaten. Hooray!
So I had a turkey sandwich. With lots and lots of ranch
dressing on it. And I'm still wanting something with ranch
dressing on it...but we don't have any pizza or anything.
So instead, I'm eating tortilla chips with refried beans.
It used to be chips and salsa...but then I put sour cream
into the salsa. I think the sour cream was bad. So i
didn't eat it :(
So, recently, I've been taking one of those "spirtual" self-
journeys. Well, not really, but I am damn good at faking
it. You'd be amazed at all the things I've discovered.
Here, I'll list them for you.
Things I have discovered lately in my intense journy into
(1) Eminem. Oh yes. You know you like his music.
(2) Ranch dressing. If I was poetic, I'd write a poem
about ranch dressing and send it into Kraft and they'd put
it on the back of every ranch dressing bottle....
(3) My bed in my room by myself. Hooray!
(4) Carmageddon. This has been the almost-highlight of my
summer so far. No longer do I have to bottle my rage at
Arizona drivers who do not use their turn signal and/or
leave the goddamn thing on for MILES while on the freeway
while simultaniously going at least 5 under the speed limit
and traveling in the lane that is well-known as "The Fast
Lane"...No. No more. I am finally able to express myself
on the virtual (but realistic, with some imagination)
roads. This is a game where there are no rules...not only
do you not have to brake for those morons on the road, but
you get to run them over and turn their car into scrap
metal. And have you ever been annoyed at those damn
pedestrians who just walk in front of your car in the
parking lots? Well, just run them right over! That's
right folks. In Carmageddon, not only do you get to run
over those little un-licencesed bastards, but you actually
get points for doing it! Hooray!
Let us all rejoice in the joy that is Carmageddon.
And for those of you who are slightly frightened by this
just let me remind you that I am JUST KIDDING.
Besides, it's two in the morning again. Cut me a little
***Oh, and what is with this shit my sister has been
downloading onto the computer? "Egyptian Belly Dance
Music"?!?! What the fuck is that???