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BLAH! 2 weeks of happiness and it's all back to the same
old routine. FRICK. Last nite, i started crying for
absolutely no reason at all. Maybe it's coz i realized
that how much of a dork i am and i'll prolly never marry.
I'm an outkast of the groupie at skool. Everyone in my
groupie listens to R&B and I listen to punk. Everyone in my
groupie loves/listens J.LO and I love/listen to NFG.
Everyone loves dancing and grinding with some "hot"
preppies. and I don't dance coz of my minimal dancing
skills. I jump/surf in moshpits with crazy ass punks/goths.
Everyone shops at MEXX/GUESS/Buffalo/Plenty. I shop at
Zumiez/Hot Topic/West49 / Fluid. They hang at the mall
after skool to pick up guys, i hang at home to just be
alone and away from everyone. They dig guys that
breakdances. I dig guy that has a band. They dig guys that
hang at clubs. I dig guys that hang at the underground punk
concerts.They wear beige/white colored stuff and jean
jackets, heals/hoop earrings and nicely tied up hair with a
mega load of hairspray. i wear black/red/yellow/gray
colored stuff with kangaroo sweat shirts, skate shoes.. no
earings(tho i have piercings) and hair that doesn't need to
be tied up. Everyone in my groupie is attached and happy
and have no clue what 'suicide/depression' means to other
ppl. Where as I am a victim of 'depression/and thoughts of
suicide'. They think i'm a weirdo coz i don't like the
things they do.... and I don't like myself very much either
coz i'm just a friggin weirdo, and nobody would want me coz
i'm butt ugly.
People say they care, but they don't. SCREW IT. FUCK
everyone who are two faced. If you don't really care about
me than shut the fuck up and get the hell outta my face.
"Crawling" -- Linkin Park