Faerie Onyx

Cheating and Future Plans

I finally got over the two assholes I'd been lamenting
over. I found a very mature guy. He's one of my best
friends, along with my girlfriend, and the three of us are
so perfect together, we even wear the same kind of
pants. My girlfriend and I wear JNCOs and kikwears
and UFOs. We went to a concert on Sunday, the three
of us, and I knew that my man had recently broken up
with his ex girlfriend. She was there, and when he was
holding me as Sugarcult played, his ex walked up to
him and tried to kiss him. *Bitch, get the fuck off of my
man!* ran through my head, I wanted to punch her, but I
wanted to see how my angel would react. He let go of
me, and I was afraid I was going to lose him, but he
pushed her off of him repeatedly. I thought she was
drunk or something, I didn't know who she was, and
she kept trying to kiss him. After the concert ended, I
was talking to my baby's friend John, and he told me
that the other girl was his girlfriend. 'No, they've been
broken up since Tuesday, and he and I have been
together since then. She's got a problem if she can't
accept that.' I responded. My boyfriend had scampered
off, which I believed to be a confession of his guilt, but
honestly he was just trying to get his ex to stop
following him around. I thought I was losing him, no, I
was afraid I was losing the person I trusted the most
with my feelings and well, me in general. Afraid of
getting hurt, I walked off with his friend John, and I tried
to sort things out in my head. His ex was convinced,
thoroughly, that he was cheating on her with me. I
wasn't sure what to think, but I wanted to believe that
she was mistaken, or jealous, or just completely
insane!! I remember feeling the need for a damnable
cigarette, and my boyfriend, who hadn't smoked in two
years, had one too. I now have four, but hopefully soon
enough I'll have someone who can buy them for me.
My girlfriend has told me that when we graduate high
school and move on to college, she will smoke. I
somehow already knew that though. I have this image
of us living in a condo in Canada lounging around in
our pajamas (completely comfortable) not caring if our
hair was washed or brushed or not, smoking cigarette
after heavenly cigarette. We'd drink a little bit of vodka
and get high too. My girlfriend wants the rest of our little
band to live with us, but I would like it to be her, my
boyfriend, and me. We could all lounge around
comfortably while wearing our pajamas and smoking
and drinking and listening to music. Maybe playing
some blues riffs on the guitar, and add a little bit of my
girlfriend's bass to the guitar... That's what I want my
life to be. If she ever wants to smoke before then,
however, I'd be more than willing to buy her cigarettes.
She told me that her mother's behaviour was causing
her pain, so much so that she (for over a year now) has
wanted to steal some of her mother's cigarettes and
smoke them to make her feel better. She's thoroughly
convinced that she will cough and choke the first time
she inhales, but I doubt it. She lives with her mother,
and her father used to smoke as well. My friend who
got me started smoking was surprised that it was the
first time I had ever smoked because I didn't cough or
anything. I was taking pretty big hits too. All I did was
have incense going a lot of the time. I love incense...
Maybe when we grow up we'll have incense going too.
My girlfriend and my boyfriend both love the smell of it.
When I asked my boyfriend (though he wasn't such at
the time) out, I figured he'd tell me he loved his
girlfriend (his ex, mentioned above), but instead he said
yes. I also figured it would be a longshot for him to say
yes to me also asking out my girlfriend. He thought it
was cool. So the next day at lunch, I whispered in her
ear, 'Will you go out with me?' She said yes, and I was
ecstatic. Now my world is perfect, well, my love life is
anyway. I have my girlfriend and my boyfriend, and they
like eachother as friends. My boyfriend thinks my
girlfriend is cute, and my girlfriend thinks my boyfriend
is hot. This is the way I want things to stay... The three
of us... Lounging around in our pajamas with guitars,
basses, drums, and CDs, smoking cigarettes, maybe
drinking a little bit, getting high, and just being mellow.

~Faerie Onyx