the one who got away

lost somewhere inside of me
2002-05-21 04:09:25 (UTC)

forever is the hour we are apart.....

so they are back
my stomach spazms that send me into the fetal postion as
well as tears every time
i guess im gonna have to go back to the doc about them and
get more medication i hate it though
i really hate it
Cam almost cried last night i could tell all he wanted to
do was to make them go away
i kept telling him it wasnt his fault but it was all i
could do to make him believe me
i still dont think he does hopefully ill be able to explain
them better tomorrow
i tried to tell him that when i get upset or stressed out i
bury everything inside and i tie my stomach in knots he
kept saying well you were mad at me the other night so its
my fault he doesnt understand that dad is the one that
causes the attacks most of the time constantly harping on
me for no reason at all
and then school i feel like a complete idiot but i have
confidenc in myself and i WILL raise my GPA this semester i
WILL get atleast all A's B's and maybe a C but nothing less
i and gonna go though im tired and here comes the pain

love you all
good night