2002-05-20 22:45:27 (UTC)


Ok so ive been having all these weird feelings about my past. People i havent seen in years now on my mind. Things i did, or didnt do now becoming fresh all over again. It happens from time to time. I mean i guess its normal to think back on occassion, right? but now i am contemplating taking a step back into the past... and i have mixed feelings about it.

Since 2weeks before my 18th birthday i have been away from my past and with the same guy. I love him very much, with all my heart... but i do think back sometimes and go "i wonder if?" etc. so now, at 25, when i say my past , you know i mean my teen years. i didnt miss them like some, i fully lived them... maybe too fully at times lol and sometimes i miss those times... and the ppl from those times.
Part of that i know comes from the fact i am a person who needs closure on all things and i left my home town on a spur of the moment without so much as a good bye to anyone. i wanted it that way, so thats the way i had it. now though, looking back i wich i had left differently.

This diary i guess is about the ppl and things that happened to me then, my life since, and especially about the past being revisited.. both in ppl and places. It's about having th echance to say the things you wish you did, and ot put closure on a lifetime past. Or atleast that is my intention lol we'll see how it turns out.....