Intrigueing diary title
2002-05-19 20:28:09 (UTC)

Here's Johnnnnnnnnnny (Des)

Well as I promised in my last entry I'll write a good one
soon and here I find myself ensconced behind my keyboard
just over a year later. As I look back over my old entries
I realise how much I have matured over the past 12
months.Back then I was a 16 year old virgin with a penchant
for writing elaborate exits and talking crap.
And now......well now I'm 17.
Anyway those of you with a weak dispositon I suggest that
you read no further as I present the harrowing tale of how
I have spent the past year.It started in June of last year
I was leaning back in my chair behind my desk when in she
"Des if you fall off that stool and break your neck its
your own fault." the soft dulcet tones of my 68 year old
transexual science teacher tore through the class like a
whippet with a bum full of dynamite.Wait a minute this is
all wrong oh bugger sorry it actually all started in July.
(mental note stop inhaling paint fumes)
Faced with a summer of inactivity and general poverty I
decided to get myself a job. Unfortunately instead of just
going and getting an application form for Mcdonalds or
something,I decided to go and make my way in the world.
I stowed aboard the first ferry I could was discovered 6
miles from the coast of Spain and spent 10 months in a
Spanish jail accused of being a spy. Luckily my lack of any
motivation and very poor hand to eye coordination
eventually convinced the Spanish authorities that I was not
James Bond Jr. So there it is not very harrowing I suppose
but this one time I did have some of this really nasty
Paella that didn't agree with me and I was locked in a
secure van for a 6 hour drive. thank God for air
conditioning is all I can say, actually thats more
disturbing than harrowing,oh well you win some(generally
through cheating) and you lose some(through complete lack
of ability)

Anyway after a year detained at the pleasure of the
Spanish government I proudly present myself leaving in an
amusing manner(well I think its amusing)
Leaps onto back of boat and and drifts away.Begins to
sing 'You'll never walk alone' is promptly devoured legs
first by a giant shark to the delight of the onlooking
crowd. Bye bye Folks Des.