Blue_dove

My screwed up life.
2002-05-12 18:51:48 (UTC)

I hate sleep

I slept really bad again. I slept on the couch for a while,
but like usual he came to "make sure I was ok" I am going
to sleep in Desi's room whether he likes it or not. I want
to talk to Bret so badly. All i think about is being with
him. I am still very mad at how Trent treated me on Wed at
the marriage councelors. I know I am naive but I don't
believe all of what he said was true. I have alot of
passion and like to be treated like i am special.For 21
years the focus of my life has been to make him happy. I
want to feel some happiness too. Only I can make that
happen. I wonder if I will be able to do it. I just odn't
know why I refuse to give in. Maybe because I feel like all
I do is give in. I am tired of everything. I want to go
away where I can sleep with no stress. I wonder how my life
got so messed up.