OhBaby It Is Me

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2002-05-10 02:08:01 (UTC)

Now I feel like shit

There are so many horrible things happening right now that
i don't think I have enough room to tell ou them all.
Shaun is 'sick', Chrissy is upset, Nick fliped out on me,
Brents trying to make moves on me, Aaron stole Dan from me,
Keith wants to beat up Nick so that he can date me, Ryan
wants to kill me, Chrissy never showed up for dance leaving
me with no ride home, and Brian is all pissed and shit at
me. Wanna read the convo?

Avman818: hiya
RobertLover411: Hi
Avman818: how are you ?
RobertLover411: I'm alright
RobertLover411: How are you?
Avman818: doing ok
Avman818: miss ya though
RobertLover411: Sorry to hear that
Avman818: yup
RobertLover411: What have you been up to?
Avman818: well had my banquet last night then worked all
day today and now just relaxin you?
RobertLover411: I went to a dinner last night and ate raw
Avman818: raw beef???=-O
RobertLover411: Yeah
Avman818: ewwwww

Avman818: sorry to bother you ang just wanted to see how
you are doing i dont know thats all i guess :-
RobertLover411: Talk to me
Avman818: what do you want to talk about angela ??? how is
school going??
RobertLover411: School is school
Avman818: i understand you there how is dance going?
Avman818: hows you bf doin?
RobertLover411: Dance is alright
RobertLover411: And me and Nick got into a fight today
Avman818: thats cool
Avman818: i see
Avman818: you want to talk about it?
RobertLover411: NOt really
Avman818: ok was just asking
RobertLover411: I know
Avman818: just trying to help
RobertLover411: thank you
RobertLover411: So did you like my dress?
Avman818: i loved it angela im sure that you look very
beautiful in it
Avman818: :-*
RobertLover411: Thank you
Avman818: your welcome angela
Avman818: thats for your prom right?
RobertLover411: Right
Avman818: well the guy who gets to take you (taking it
that is nick) is a very lucky guy he gets a great girl in a
beautiful dress
RobertLover411: Thank you
Avman818: your welcome as always angela
RobertLover411: So what did you guys do after you left my
house the other day?
Avman818: went to dicks then the mall then went to dennys
then came home not very exciting
RobertLover411: I really wanted to go
Avman818: i know
Avman818: why though?
RobertLover411: Just to be with you guys
Avman818: really wanted you to go too
RobertLover411: Travis with the pony song
Avman818: i know
Avman818: we have to find something to do sometime
especially before i leave
RobertLover411: Yep
Avman818: angela i am so confused
RobertLover411: why for how come?
Avman818: i dont know it seems that somedays you are ok
talking to me and others it seems as if i am burdening
your life and i do not want to do that sometimes i dont
know how you feel about me sometimes i feel as if you
hate me i understand that alot is on your mind and some
of it is about me and the past but i just wish we could sit
down and talk whatever is up out you know how i care for
you and you know i never ever ment to hurt you yes i did
but i did not know that what happened had effected you so..
Avman818: much and if i would have known believe me i would
not have let it go on you know you are a special girl
and that i care for you and i want you to be happy
RobertLover411: See this is what scares me
Avman818: and it seems at this point i am making you
miserable and somedays i feel as if i should gracefully
remove myself from your life and you would be better off
Avman818: what about it scares you ?
RobertLover411: I don't want you to be all in love with me
and talk to me as if you want to marry me, I just want you
to be the same best friend that I had back on the bus
RobertLover411: The worst part is that I know it can never
be that same way again
Avman818: i am not trying to talk to you as if i want to
marry you angela i am talking how i feel if that is
wrong i am sorry i have to go craig needs the
phone and i am not all in love with you i care about
you and love you as i always did im not in love with
you just miss you as "angela"
Avman818: i dont know what to do anymore guess i
should do what i did last night now
RobertLover411: What are youl talking about
RobertLover411: All I'm doing is telling you how I feel
RobertLover411: how come you can do it but get mad when i
Avman818: i am not getting mad i am confused lost
frustrated sad and depressed
RobertLover411: You've changed so much and I've just stayed
the same and now you act like you don't even know me when
you know about me then I do

It's so sad though, he has no idea what he's saying to me
nor does he have any idea who I am anymore. I'm just going
to sit back and sail it out though. I'm a fighter and if
it comes down to it I will throw a few punches, you just
ask Billy. When I say I'm gonna punch someone, I freakin