beloved

faster
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2002-05-09 20:19:44 (UTC)

im leaving soon

5 months ago i had hope 5 months ago it was sorta funny 5 months
ago i still listened to u 5 months ago i thought u loved me 5 months
ago i thought u sacrificed for me 5 months ago i thought i was the
best pussy u will ever have 5 months ago i could touch you
5 months ago is a VERY LONG
FUCKING TIME thats all i have to say im sorta pissed off and im
sorry for being mad but i am being honeset its very frustrating to
be tormented by the fact that you have no money or any way of making
yourself thinner or prettier and actually im gettin uglier and more
stress out being homeless and then to rub it in by doing what the
fuck ever with girls that have money to go and make themselves look
better..give me a pass to ballys and some good makeup hair
salon...etc and maybe i wouldnt feel so fucking mistreated neglected
and most of all HOMELESS..i am not acting homeless because its funny
or acting to sell my body to buy necessary stuff because apparently
im not important enough to be taken care of and i fucked up too much
or whatever..if you are visiting a shelter but you really have
somewhere to go then its a lot simpler to be nice and have everyone
love you but if you actually living there and u dont know if youll
ever leave its a lot more difficult and im sure i do have a negative
personality now but how could i not how long has it been how many
times have i gotten my hopes up just to get them knocked down again
and feel even less hopeful and as i sacrfice myself the very people
im doing it for are disrespecting and most of all NOT HELPING. right
now i dont feel happy or beautiful especially if im made to feel
like im not and someone has to find other people that may be more
exciting because they actually have a life. what if i die then
maybe u will realize this is important. havent i been through
enough. yes i fucked up i said some stupid things i still do but i
would probably be a lot nicer and a lot prettier and thinner if i
wasnt fucking
homeless.............................................................
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...............................no im not
upset ...............................................................
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dont fuckin leave me here


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