Claudia Ellen

I'm OK when not OK
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2001-06-05 14:20:17 (UTC)

Thoughts right now...I picked up a magazine

I decided, this morning, to create an online journal. I
want to order my thoughts, classify my dreams and work out
how I honestly feel. I also thought this would be an easy
way to document my travelling experiences...

Not sure if if I am supposed to start off with an
introductory passage. Might as well...

Rochelle is my name. I also go by Pup, Chelle and Beach...

21. Arts/Law. Bored.

My dream is to live each day surruonded by my passions.

Tori Amos saved me from a fate worse than death...ignorance
of my soul. That may sound fucking pathetic and terribly
pretentious, but it is the only way I know how to explain
what she did to me. I heard her sing, listened to her
message, and realised that it is OK to feel. Really feel.

I am mad at myself for falling in and out of love too
easily. And perhaps, not knowing the difference between
love and like-a-lot. At the moment, I am scared that I am
still wrapped up in my ex-boyfriend, the boy who woke up
the femaleness inside me.

I am on a journey. I want to be able to take each day as it
drops on my doorstep, but scared of not having complete

I'll finish with my lyrics of the day:

"When you gonna stand on you're own?
I say 'the world is sick', you say 'tell me what that makes
us darlin'?'
You see you always find my faults faster than you find your
You say 'the world is getting rid of her demons', I
say 'baby what have you been smokin'?'..."

Upside Down - Tori Amos

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