Me and More
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2002-05-07 07:45:44 (UTC)

Tonight should be the night I die

Diary peeps-
Sometimes I wonder why I still hang on. Why do I still live
and get hurt? Why must I go through this constant pain? I
fall in love and have my heart broken time and time again.
Why do people have to be so mean?

I wonder if I would even be missed. Who would find me first
in my bed, lying there no longer breathing. Sometimes I
wonder if anyone would find me or would I just lay there
rotting. I have the fail proof of doing it too. I would
slip into a dreamless and painless sleep and never wake up.

But that's to easy. Maybe I should just go downtown to the
drug area and wait to be shot. I know in my heart that even
if I wanted to I couldn't for two reasons : My sister and
Michelle. If I killed myself I would hurt them to much and
I can't do that. So I guess I just have to wait for my time
to come right?

I guess so. Nick tried to cheer me up but it didn't work.
Nothing is working right now. My life is an empty abyss of


Don't worry i'm not gone yet.

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