lindsay ann

somewhere in between
2002-05-03 17:42:56 (UTC)

lone ranger

britt's been gone for 2 days...i tried calling yesterday
and no one answered. hmm. i can't eat without brittany
around! well i didn't eat yesterday- usually she comes into
the library after 4th period so we can walk to lunch
together. yesterday, she wasn't here and i was so wrapped
up in my work that i stayed until the librarian said, "it's
passing period...5th starts in 4 minutes!" and i was like
WHOA!!! school is weird without bells.

uh, what else? i've had a really good week, though. i
mean, i need to sleep for like 40 hours this weekend, but
other than that things were cool. finished that gay term
paper, did my lecture for euro yesterday, had youth group
where i had a really good chat w/ kristen, went running a
few times, went to coffee and bought my llllllloverrrrrr a
drink. HAHA eeeeeeuuuwww!

yeah but in general, i've had these two little thoughts
beating around in my brain. things i've discovered in my
life based on the things i'm told and the things no one
ever says:

1) 90% of the time, people are lying to your face. sounds
cynical, but in one way or another, it's true

2) i'm a disappointment to people like paul, kristen, my
grandmother (not my bamma), my mom, etc...just because i no
longer want to be a doctor or a missionary or a singer,
just because i want to take a year off after high school, marry
young, maybe not even have a career...all this stuff makes
people smack their heads as if to say, "what is she
thiiiinking? we put all this hard work into her!" i am a
tragic waste of everyone's time. i have the potential to
be a great mind but all i want to be is a great mom. so
kill me.