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so i havent cried yet. i know..
so i havent cried yet.
i know it will come eventually.
maybe when i see her.
maybe when it hits me.
right now, all i am is mad..
mad that she could do this to me..
the one she proclaimed over and over again to love so
i guess that just wasnt enough for her.
i guess she needed more love.
everytime i dont trust myself.
i get fucked.
i should have.
and i didnt.
i wasnt able to.
and i didnt mean to read it.
i feel like im going to vomit.
i gave her everything.
now what is left.
i fucked over my friends.
fucked up shit with my mom.
i did so much
and now ill be written off as just another girl
she fucked over.
im a fucking checkmark in her book
what the fuck was i doing thinking that things were
i really intended on making her my wife.
things have been so good recently.
shes my best fucking friend.
now what do i have.
can we say ohhhhhh sandy all over again.
when are you going to learn ashley.
caring about people just gets you hurt.
i swore i wouldnt.
i didnt mean to.
and i did.
i fucking did.