.. i have to get out...
we do not get along. It is just plain and simple. As much
as she wants to give me her sad ass sob stories about how
much she is gonna miss me, she makes it impossible to live
w/ her. We argue over the most ignorant shit. She loves to
pick fights. I cant take her shit anymore. I have to get
out of here. Orlando, miami, new york, london, anywhere but
here. She made me have an arguement w/ J. He hung up the
phone all pissed with me... giving me that "ill talk to you
whenever then" bullshit. If he doesnt call me back tonight,
i dont want to hear shit he has to say tomorrow.
I am so tired of crying. I cry everyday. My body cant take
it anymore. I just want to be normal. NO problems. No
worries. No headaches, no fighting. No pain. That would be
impossible wouldnt it? I dont know what to do anymore. I
have a meeting w/ my therapist on monday. I am so scared.
Our first visit was so rough. I am so scared of her. Of
what she may uncover about those 6 years of my life that i
lost. Those years i dont remember. I am so scared of what i
am doing to myself. I need out. Maybe there is only one
thing left.... one way out. One way to relieve all the
pain.. so i feel it NO more.