redstarfish2

No Matter How Hard I Try...
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2002-04-29 15:34:47 (UTC)

I am home and you are not! :)

Hey! well, it's 11:21 AM and I am home! I woke up at 6:15
this morning and the bus comes at 6:20. I didn't take a
shower yesterday morning because I was at friends house, so
I just stayed home. It was great. Sleep is so good.
***

Stages

Happiness.
Feeling high and carefree.
Feeling that no one can take away what you have.

Confusion.
Do I really want this?
Or is this simply because I can?

Doubt.
Things will never last, they never do.
Why do I do this? It's so dumb.

Thinking.
Dreaming sinerios and possibilities.
Then realizing you want something more.

Knowledge.
Knowing how much you can ruin things,
Not only for yourself, but at least 3 other people.

Decisions.
Some good, most bad,
Always wanting to turn back.

Hiding.
Trying to be invisible,
Trying to be un noticed.

Regret.
That's what it all boils down to,
Regret and Stupidness.

~Ashley Bott
4/29/02



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