My WasTe-LanD oF iNNeR thOughTz
Brain-deadness does wonders, dontcha think?
Hey-low there..just thought I'd mail out some krap here..
Nuffin exceptionally exciting happened today, cos' I'm just
stayin home..No use goin out anyway, cos the outsyde world
suxx anyway.. I found a few cool thyngs in my email that I
think should be posted here.. Plus, that kinda shyt pisses
me off too..
Adult language...if you offend easily, better not
Shit That Pisses Me Off
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for
the time. I know
where my watch is, buddy ... where the fuck is
yours? Do I point at
my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
2. The Pillsbury Doughboy is waaaayyy too happy
considering that he
doesn't have a dick!
3. People who are willing to get off their ass to
search the entire
room for the damn remote because they refuse to
walk to the TV and
change it manually!
4. When people say..."Oh, you just want to have your
cake and eat it,
too." Fuck off!!! What good is a damn piece of
cake if you can't
eat it? What should I do...eat someone else's
piece of cake
5. When people say..."It's always the last place you
look." No shit,
Dick Tracy!! Why the hell would you keep looking
for it after you've
already found it?? Do people do this?? Who the
hell are they and
why are they still living?
6. When people say, while watching a movie ..."Did
you see that?"
No, dicknose, I paid $7.50 to come to a theater
and stare at the
fucking ceiling up there. What did you come here
7. People who ask, "Can I ask you a question?"
Didn't really give me a
choice there did, ya jackass?
8. When something is "New & Improved." Which is it?
If it's new, there
has never been anything like it before, if it's
there must have been something before it! And
don't get me started
about the 'economy size.' And don't ya just love
put those damn price comparison things. Ever
notice that the one
you're looking at is priced per ounce & the one
you want to compare
it to is priced per each. Those bastards should
be taken out back &
shot or maybe worse yet, made to stand in their
damn Express lines
where there are 9 people ahead of you who can't
count being checked
out by a brain damaged Neanderthal zit infested
examining their nasal cavity with their middle
it. Hey, it's less than 10 items.
9. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you
know how fast you
were going. "You should know, asshole. You're the
one that pulled me
10. Hey dick breath! Those colored lights on the
corners of your car
aren't for decoration. Try and let someone know
what you're going
to do and I'll try not to take out the 9mm under
my seat and rid
the world of another idiot who got their license
our of a Froot
Loops box. And when you make a right turn onto a
4 lane highway,
stay in the fucking curb lane asswipe. If you
need the whole
fucking road to make that turn, we can get you a
11. Chain letters! Who the hell thinks that by
annoying other people
with stupid mail with no meaning, that they will
grant you a wish,
or make your long-lost love fall into your arms.
Bullshit! I'm so
sure that by breaking a stupid chain letter that
the computer gods
are going to curse me!! What a crock of shit!!!
By the way, if you send this to 10 people, shit
won't happen, and that
person you're in love with won't come crawling to
you...so if you feel
this is funny, go on and send it to someone else,
but don't expect one
fucking thing in return. No genie will appear to
pathetic wishes. No magic surprise will appear on
your screen. Bill
Gates won't send you $1,000 and Coke won't send you
a free case. If you
pass this shit on, may the computer gods send you a
CYL, I'll spout more crap later..
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