I hate my life
2001-05-30 11:42:09 (UTC)

Why are guys such jerks? They..

Why are guys such jerks? They can be sweet one minute and a
prick the next! Where does that come in fair for us
girls?!?!? Well anyways my ex thinks he's like a pimp now.
It's so stupid. I just wish he would ask me out again so I
can tell him to go to hell! It would be great. Because I
know he's not a pimp I mean come on he's still a virgin and
thinks sex is nasty! What the hell is up with that? Most
guys love the idea of sex. But no not him. He thinks it's
nasty. Also I found out why the asshole dumped me. Because
I smoke and drink and other shit sometimes. (Well I smoke
all the time but thats not the point.) Well anyways his
girl friend has to be almost perfect in his eyes. I must of
been a figment of his imaginatin or maybe just maybe he was
a figment of my imagination! I thought he was different
from all the other preps look how wrong I was. He's just
another self conseated prick! Oh well I guess I will live.
Even though when he dumped me I wanted to crawl in a hole
and die! Who wouldn't though. I mean one minute I'm happy
and I don't think I'll ever be sad again. Then all of a
sudden without worning he dumps me! What the hell is up
with that. I was even quiting smoking. I had it down to
like two cigs a day. Now im back up to 7 or 8 a day. I
guess I'll just have to prove I can quit. No one believes
me when I say if I want to I can quit. But I know I can. I
have before. (No one needs to know that though.) It's
really no biggy anymore. Besides I kind of want to quit. I
mean it's bad for my health. But what can you do when your
body thinks you need a cig? I know it sounds like an excuse
and maybe it is but I guess that is my problem to work out.
No one seems to understand what I have been going through
with all my health problems and everything. My aorta to my
legs is basicly kinked off. Not like it matters to anyone
reading this. They just want something to do. I guess I
should put some more stuff in here that would be more
interesting then my own health problems but this is my
diary so I can do whatever the hell I want in it. No one
can stop me. That is the good thing about this diary No one
but me contorls it. Well maybe the site does but I contorl
what it has written in it. Don't you think? I don't know
why I got up so early today. I was up by 5 am. That's
really odd. Because I normally get up at like 12 pm. man my
hands sure are sore because of everything I did yesterday.
I know alot of people don't think I can put in a good days
work but yesterday I sure as hell proved them wrong. But
now my hands hurt that is the only bad part. The good part
is I get paid for helping. I might go back today and work
again. It doesn't sound like that bad of an idea. I could
just like walk around and make sure this one guy does his
work. You know kind of watch him and write down how much he
works and stuff. Because he like slacks off alot. I mean I
will just keep walking in and out like once every hour and
just see if he needs help. I don't really want to help him
but I will just so that way he fucking works and not talks.
I guess that is just me though. Because last week he didn't
do any work. All he did was talk and he got paid for it.
The boss wasn't to happy about that. I would of fired his
ass by now. We have a baby coon now. It's our new pet and
it's so cute. I love feeding it.