Visions Of Life
I am happy.
I wake up every morning and no matter what horrible thing
is going on in my world, I wake up happy and next to
someone I love.
Im not really sick anymore. Im a bit disturbed because Im
still bleeding and its been five days and I think they said
id bleed for one or two days. Tonight I havnt had any pain
which is a plus. The money that was going towards my
insurance isnt coming so I cant go to a doctor for my
checkup and Ill have a huge medical bill but oh well. At
least Im not sick anymore. I need to call someone and find
out about why Im still bleeding. i hope i havnt been doing
to much.. Which I know I have been.
Everything else is going fine. Like i said, i am very
happy. The maority of my stress is gone. Now if i can find
a job I will no longer be stressed for the most part.
I was a bit emotional last night. I feel like my mom is
embarassed of me and she has a right to be. I hate doing
things that she is too embarssed to even talk about and I
seem to have done alot of things like that. It seems like
nothing I ever do is good enough for them and it doesnt
matter fi Im happy or not, if I dont live my life they want
me to, they are ashamed of me. It doesnt seem to matter to
them that Im a good person and try really hard to suceed.
All anyone cares about is school and money. I cant even get
trhough to them about how much me and my boyfriend love
eachother. They think Im just a slut who got knocked up.
They never told me that but I can see it in my moms eyes.
Its depressing. I almost want to say to hell with them and
call them in like two years. All I can do is try my hardest
and hope thats good enough.