soul survivor
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2001-05-23 21:54:31 (UTC)

At the rate i'm going i don't think i'll ever be happy

Dear Diary...
like my title says "at the rate i'm going i don't think
i'll ever be happy" geez i make the stupidest mistakes in
my frigging teen years..and what mistake would that be you
might ask??? taking back the one person who i know won't
fucking change no matter what i do. It's never gonna work
and why don't i see that?? i can't see it cause he's been
the closes thing to me. I guess i don't want to except that
he won't change. I also learned once a relationship doesn't
work it won't work the 2nd time or 3rd time it WON'T WORK
unless you are totally sure that you have each others
commitments. Now that i think of it i don't have the
commitment rite now. I'm too happy livng my life how it is
being single and flirting like mad. I love to flirt w/ a
hot guy who comes up and talks to me and not have me worry
about having my b/f get jealous. I'm not ready to be in
that sort of thing. i jut like having fun and partying with
them but not dating. But eventually i'll start dating when
the time is right though, thats a fact. I know oneday i'll
be happy but i won't be happy if i keep on taking brian
back, i admitt i have feelings for the guy but thats as far
as it's gonna go. After all the relationships i've been through w/
brian i've been more picker and more caution about the guys i choose
now. i never use to be this picker adn now i am. I guess to find the
write person you have to be picky. i'm just afraid if i get even more
picker as it is i'm never gonna find the one true love.
love lise

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