Passenger17

Thoughts arrive like butterflies
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2002-04-09 20:19:30 (UTC)

09.04.02

God I'm so angry right now!!
I have had an ok day today. Nothing too bad happened, I
come home, listened to my cd's no homework and relaxed. I
had a relaxing bath then fell asleep for a while, I woke
up, turned on the computer then the phone fuking rang. MY
DADS FUCKING FRIEND. He's been on it for 20 minutes.
I had it all planned out. Computer, check pm's, bed.
Because my sister and mum are out. My sister 12 YEARS OLD
will be running around the house screaming, giggluing
trying to kiss my mum and dad. She a fucking loser and I
can't stand her. So I know I'd get no sleep then so I
figured I'd tgo to bed beforte they came home, but no. Dad
was still on the phone whoils I was shredding up my fucking
arms again. I hate doing it but the pain, it calms me
down...But I hate doing it. I throw things around and
things like that, but I don't want anyone to hear so I do
it quietly, so they don't find out, but I have PE tomorrow.
I know it's my own fault and thats why I hate myself even
more for doing it. I'm a selfish bitch I know because I
wouldn't let my dad talk for 20 minutes on the phone.

Have you ever prayed knowing full well that no one is
listening?


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